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The After Times-Gazette-Picayune

Editor’s note: Since our first edition last Friday, we absorbed the End Times Gazette into our operations. New name, same great taste! Many things are linked throughout too, so don’t forget to click and enjoy!

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The Failing NFL! The president scolded the NFL for not forcing its players to stand for the anthem. While the editors of the Times Gazette-Picayune think that this issue has become more about kneeling and less about protesting the murder of unarmed black Americans by police, we include this story to inform you that the NFL has not made moves to mandate players standing for the anthem. It is important to note that the reasons that are being used for making them stand include (1) disrespecting the country and (2) disrespecting the military because our next story covers…

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HE KNEW WHAT HE WAS SIGNING UP FOR: First the president stated that previous presidents didn’t make calls to bereaved families of fallen soldiers, and then he told the widow of one of the soldiers killed in Niger that “he knew what he was signing up for.” It is basically the norm now to experience this kind of hypocrisy and it is almost impossible to avoid the issue of race and how the president and others are just mad that blacks are being “uppity” and also what’s another black/brown life lost? But don’t disrespect our military…as long as they are white. Otherwise they should have known that they could die, what do we even owe them? But they die for the players to have the right to protest, but we don’t want them to protest because it’s disrespect for the military…I’m dizzy! It’s like a merry-go-round of insanity!

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Bernie Sanders vs. Ted Cruz in the Thunderdome: CNN debates between politicians are a thing? We’re not in an election season just yet, right? Does anyone really need to see Ted Zodiac Killer Cruz and Bernie Fucking Sanders yell at each other about taxes? Here, we’ll save you some time with the short summary of the debate below, but the link above will take you to the CNN highlights.

Bernie: HEALTH CARE FOR ALL

Ted: CUT TAXES

Bernie: RAISE TAXES ON THE RICH

Ted: CUT TAXES

Ted: zodiac killer

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NAZIS! In local news, white supremacy gives a speech in Florida! Richard Spencer came to the University of Florida to explain to alligators why white people are the best and also that we should cleanse the world of all non-white people. The governor of Florida and snake person Rick Scott declared a state of emergency ahead of the event, expecting another Charlottesville, but at the time of this publication it looks like all ended peacefully. Enjoy this short video of Richard Spencer being punched. PUNCH NAZIS, BE FREE.

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2022 Winter Olympics in China: Beijing doesn’t have any snow, but is somehow hosting the winter olympics. So they are forming a “snow affairs work team” to figure out how to make and preserve enough snow for an entire Olympics in a city where is hardly ever snows naturally and has no mountains; they are already planning to send competitors to neighboring rural locations via high speed rail for events at “sports clusters” and I’m not sure what that means but basically I don’t see how this won’t be a very expensive disaster.

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Rap Snacks! Apparently there are potato chips that are linked to “famous” rappers that you can order and consume on the internet. I have an Echo Dot and Alexa decided to give me this information randomly in the middle of my Saturday evening without being asked and now it’s something I can’t unlearn and neither can you. Enjoy Fetty Wap’s Honey Jalapeno or Lil’ Boosie’s Louisiana Heat Ripple Chips, and the food may even make their music more enjoyable too!

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October 13

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