What is the journey of  a woman? If you had to make a list of the lessons a woman must learn as she travels through life, what would you include. I would suggest that you look no further than Circe by Madeline Miller for your guidance.

How do we, as women, leave the house of our father, of our mother, and find strength in solitude? The act of redefining ourselves simply as ourselves is no small feat. Our entire childhood is influenced and controlled by those who chose to bring us into this world. We believe what we are told to believe, what we see around us, what we hear and see and feel. Those moments where we are separate give us the opportunity to explore what we know and compare it to what is real.

But sometimes in that exploration, naivete can be dangerous. If we come to the world too trusting, or not trusting enough, balancing is necessary. Such balancing can be harmful, and we must add coping with tragedy, abuse, or rape, either of our minds or bodies, to our journey of self-definition.

We use others as mirrors. Is this who I want to be? What does being like this person feel like? Relationships with others allow us to put on costumes and outfits that others wear to see if we can use their definition as a piece of ours, and in the process we become other people instead of being ourselves. It’s like a thrift store or a patchwork quilt that we make for ourselves. Keeping the things we enjoy, and leaving the bad pieces behind.

Once we have shed the skin of our family and decided we can not be anyone else, our mind opens to what we truly want, who we truly are, and if we are very lucky we get the chance to make the choice to become that person we were becoming all along. We get the chance to choose to be ourselves.

It’s worth mentioning that The Song of Achilles was one of the most moving books I have ever read. I knew the myth and the stories but to hear it told through the eyes of Patroclus, Achilles’ lover, was a balm to my spirit and a soft hand on my soul. Having now added the experience of Circe to my reading I find myself in the position to demand at least fifty more myths retold by Madeline Miller. If each one sings to my heart as these two have, I will read them all, and gladly.

Please go and read Circe. Especially if you are a woman. Especially if you have had a difficult road. Especially if you’ve found your way back to yourself. You will absolutely love this literary, mythical journey.

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