There isn’t a lot to say about Samantha Irby’s new set of essays that hasn’t already been said by a lot of people smarter and more highly paid than me. I think that when I read her work, I see a life that is possible. Inherent permission to live a life that is unapologetic, that is focused on the true self and pursuing what makes that actual self happy (or at least less miserable). People focus so much on the things that we should to or are supposed to do, but they never realize that most of the time they don’t need someone’s permission to choose to do something else.
I also appreciate that Irby weaves in the obstacles and problems with the search for such a life in with humor and sarcasm. We’re all laughing and crying because, for the most part, women have experienced a lot of these struggles before. I would give literally anything to have my doctor agree to microwave my uterus so I don’t have to dread having another IUD inserted in 2021. I am not using it and all it gives me is despair, if you will not remove it please kill it and save us all the trouble.
I worry though that these high paid people, people smarter and higher up than me feel like they are vacationing in someone else’s life, which is basically what anyone does when they read a memoir sure. What I mean is that unless you’ve experienced poverty, a landlord that basically fucks with you, HUNGER, anything that Irby jauntily floats us all through with humor and self-deprecation, you’re not hearing the fear, the desperation, and the relief in a lot of these essays. A few of the above linked reviews talk about how these essays feel different. When I read that, I balked at it because it was almost like they were saying she wasn’t struggling enough to be as edgy as she was in the past. This most recent collection feels different because life feels a lot different when you don’t have to constantly worry about getting kicked out of your apartment and are getting proper healthcare and enough to eat. Life feels different when you have people around that love and support you and that you can love and support in return.
Irby’s books are a journey to this stability, and each collection of essays feels different because each one brings us closer to what every poor kid wishes for themselves and others: seeing that Irby is going to be okay. Does she still have health problems and other issues that we love to hear her complain about? Sure, but I feel a lot better reading them knowing that at the core of them, she’s relatively safe and happy. I can’t wait to hear more and will be preordering book 4. Wow, yes thank you. 🙂
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